Hi! Apparently I’m the most efficient during night time so I wanted to put up a post for you – discussing looks, mostly my hair, style and boobs this time. This topic came to mind recently since I’ve been hitting bars lately. Like A LOT. Being single and having boobs and a certain sense of fashion is not always easy and I wanted to rant but also make you think about it from my perspective. Now I must say that YOU GUYS OUT THERE, listen up cause I’m sick of you judging me for various reasons.
This started out as mild amusement towards men who have a tendency to look at me from head to toe each time I walked through a bar door. Staring with eyes like massive plates I used to just laugh it all off, think how funny your gazes were and go on with my life. Girls looking at me were even funnier. Eat your heart out, I used to think. Then I started to miss male company, I started to miss being in a relationship.
I must confess, I’m not much of a single girl at heart. I don’t know how to hit on guys, I am actually quite shy when it comes to men I really like and am interested in. On the contrary that is not how I look; I actually seem like an arrogant bitch to some people, or so it seems. Last time I went to a bar with studded red suede heels with a massive pink bun on my head. I was a show stopper, big time. I live in a city where anyone looking like that gets basically stoned for being such a cocky-ass bitch. However, I love everything bold and colourful. Everything that looks like me. This is where we get to the root of my problem.
I love to look how I look but to other people I seem to be a red flag, waiting to be teared up by a herd of bulls. It scares people off, it makes me seem arrogant, it makes me less approachable. Add a pair of G cups and it makes me a damn slut. To some. I hate noticing after a wild dancing session everyone staring at me and whispering. You say I asked for it, I say I just wanted to dance. I go talking to a strange man, I’m almost begging for dirty looks from fellow women. And again, I was just trying to get to know someone.
Getting to know a new guy is a whole other story. I love men, but then again I hate you so dearly for being dicks about my appearance. “Omg, how can wear that?” is probably one of the worst things to say to a girl and believe me, I hear it a lot. I mean, does it make me a bad person if I wear something you wouldn’t? Does my outfit define me as a person? Hell no. Cause today I dress like this, tomorrow like something completely different. I am a gangsta, then a pin-up, another day a sports chick. What does that say about me? That I’m versatile, I feel differently about myself and the world each day and dress for that mood. The only thing that my outfit of the night tells you, is how I felt when I left my house. Try to read me like a book, it will be a failure. Promise.
I recently saw this super funny video made by hilarious Jenna Marbles about what a girl’s hair means. It was right to the point; now you can judge girls even faster cause hey, their hairstyle says everything you need to know (NOT). Like I will suck your dick cause I have pink hair! Seriously, it’s funny now but think about it for one more minute and you’ll start to see how scary it is how people make crazy assumptions on your character just by looking at your hair, makeup or eg boobs. I mean WHY? You guys who stare at me like some cheap piece of pork meat, did you know that I too have feelings, I can be a wonderful girlfriend and the most giving loving person on the earth? No, you didn’t. And meanwhile I could have been someone’s dream future wife, you would never know cause I had that damn pink hair. Which obviously told you I’m not girlfriend material.
I am so sick of this small town that wants to drown me in all its grayness and suffocate me with it’s prejudiced little people who apparently know all about me. I want to get to know people, I want to enjoy and hell I want to enjoy my clothes and cleavage when I feel like it without constant judgement passed upon me. I will never please everyone but at least hate me for who I am, not for what I look like.
PS. In the pic above are me and my little sister Ems. Stylish est 1992 and rocking the look.