Tag Archives: body image

Shopping For My Hourglass Figure – Let’s Talk About Size Charts

2 Nov

I am so sorry for neglecting you loves for a few days now – my grandpa just passed away and I wanted to take a moment to just grieve and also give myself a little me-time. However, now I am back and want to keep posting more regularly. Today, I wanted to tackle the topic of women’s sizing these days and talk a little bit about what we mean when we say that something is true-to-size.

I know sizing can be a difficult topic to discuss – it always raises an battle of wills and opinions as we all think differently about sizes and also have different emotional bonds to our dress size. When you used to fit into say, size 8 and then need a 12 with some random piece of clothing, it will stir maybe some swear words or even tears. I used wear a size 6 but have now gone up to 10, even after I slimmed down a couple of inches on my waist. I have battled the fear of sizes above 8 since I got ill with anorexia even though each brand fits differently and your dress size doesn’t actually MEAN anything special.

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I was never very small when I was child – just a regular sized kid with a fuller bust that made me feel fat at a very young age. I developed breasts at age eleven and I got teased for it quite a bit as I was not supposed to be curvy when others still looked like children. At age 16 I started to develop disordered eating habits and thoughts regarding my body – just because I felt so isolated from other teenage girls. I was not flat, I was not sporty and I definitely wasn’t slim in my opinion. However, I was never above UK size 10-12 so my weight wasn’t a problem at any point – but still, it was a big issue for me. I never got my boobs to fit into anything that was less than a size 10 and I was frustrated as I felt so big compared to others.

In the above picture I am not at my smallest but at a point where I started to recover from anorexia and was breaking up from my ex at the same time. I was gaining weight and shimmed myself into my old size 8 Oasis dress which dramatically ripped from its back seam at that very occasion (my sister’s matriculation party). I was devastated as I felt that I couldn’t live up to that size 8 standard anymore. Damn Oasis! Damn my old dress which had been a bit loose about a year ago.

I took a look at Oasis size chart today and currently their size 8 is meant for a 25,6″ waist and a size 10 for a 27,6″. With British sizing, dress sizes usually escalate the way that each dress size accommodates a two inch larger waist than the previous one. However, most brands have very different size charts to each other and I find a lot of people using the terms “true-to-size” and variations of it while describing brand sizing. To me, this seams odd since every blogger and consumer seems to have a different opinion on what “true-to-size” means.

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True-to-size compared to what? With bras, there is a more solid ground to compare the sizing – some well-established brands can be compared to as they usually fit very similarly. By well-established I mean eg Eveden brands and Panache. Also there are less brands in the business which makes the comparison easier. However, with regular clothing the sizes vary so much that it’s actually pretty hard to come up with some kind of standard fit to compare brands to. I have found that many brands’ size 10 fit about 28″ waist but I have also seen a few bloggers call those brands to run big. As dress size is a rather sensitive topic, I feel a bit “meh” about this kind of categorizing as it gives you the impression that some brands and their size charts are more or less right or wrong.

Besides being inconsistent from brand to brand, sizing can also be inconsistent inside a certain brand. I am wearing a Dorothy Perkins size 8 in the picture above though their size chart would put me somewhere near size 12. After trying a few styles in-store, I realized they fitted very inconsistently and I would definitely not dare to order from them online because the sizing is so hit-and-miss.

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Pic by the lovely Tania (see the squished boob – not attractive!)

I also find the different body part measurements a bit tricky. For instance, some brands might both measure 28″ at waist with size 10 but then measure 34″ or 36″ at bust. This is why talking about something being “true-to-size” doesn’t make sense – which one of the measurements fits true-to-size; bust, waist or hips, all or none? Also some brands come up with measurements that seem super unfair to me – but this is just my subjective view on the matter. Let’s take some very common measurements for UK size 10: 34-28-38. Does this seem realistic to you? My answer would be yes, to some body types. When I see 36″ instead of 34″ I jump with joy as the 34″ bust measurement is a far cry from my 39-40″ bust and with 36″ I might be able squeeze myself into a dress that is still a bit too snug.

I am all for making clothes for every body type – pears, apples, hourglasses, and lollipops etc. but there is far too little choices for people who actually don’t fit the 34-28-38 frame. I myself am about 39-28-38 which means I have very hard time finding clothing that would look and feel good, not to mention getting the zipper past my upper torso. So many brands are favouring girls with a pear shaped or straight body type and it saddens me cause I can never live up to that standard.

This was it for this time but I would love to extend the conversation to the comment box – how do you feel about today’s sizing standards and where do you usually find clothes to suit your body type? xx

My boudoir experience with Andrew Wood Photography

22 Mar

There is a great experience I haven’t told you about yet, mostly due to some technical issues I’ve had recently (read: I wrote an entire post about it and it vanished before publishing, thanks to WordPress). However I can no longer postpone rewriting the whole story to you, since I believe there are so many of my dear friends as well anticipating to hear about my experience with Andrew Wood Photography and my boudoir shoot with them. 

A while ago I saw George of Fuller Figure Fuller Bust posting a bunch of lovely pictures of her and to my surprise the very same studio held a competition with FFFB to giveaway a few complimentary photoshoots for some lucky ladies. When I got the email saying I was one of those ladies chosen to do a boudoir photoshoot with Andrew Wood Photography I couldn’t believe my luck. I never win anything! I rushed to call the studio and in no time had booked my very first boudoir shoot. The lovely lady on the phone gave me clear instructions what to bring with me and also told what was going to happen, on my own terms of course.

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When the day arrived I was super nervous and ran to the bus stop at seven in the morning, and guess what – I fell. Face down, to the pavement. The bus driver felt so bad for me he literally let me in the bus without even paying anything for it. No wonder, my face was bleeding and bruised. Soon I could see my blood vessels through my cheek, becoming dark and very notable. I thought my shoot would be ruined and called Andrew to ask whether we should do it another time. He was absolutely lovely and told me to get there anyway since the makeup artist was a pro and they could also do some pretty magical airbrushing. Tearing up at the train station I got my ass in the train and finally arrived at the studio in Manchester to face very sympathetic yet a bit amused faces. I got myself a glass of bubbly and finally sat down to the makeup artist’s chair aka the the place where magic happens.

And magic it was. First of all, Rebecca is one of the loveliest people I’ve ever met. So funny, bubbly and apparently gets along with everyone. She is also a perfectionist and very creative which meant me getting a total makeover from the bruised corpse bride to Cinderella. I requested a vintage-like look which was also one of Rebecca’s favourites to do so we hit off right from the start. As trying desperately to make my victory rolls (apparently my hair is in great condition which means it’s super hard to work with) Rebecca decided to make me a whole crown of rolls pinned up to the top of my head. Needless to say, it looked awesome.

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When my makeup and hair was done I got whisked off my photoshoot with Kayleigh who was so lovely and listened to all my wishes and insecurities I had about my body. I am not comfortable showing my tummy area and wanted the pictures to highlight my best features. Kayleigh totally got me and worked with me to get the best out of my face and body. I felt really at ease and actually very confident around her which is great when you are photographed in your undies. 

Soon the photoshoot was over and I got back home with a confidence that my photos had turned out lovely. However when they offered me a time to view my pics when my bf was in town I turned the offer down since I wanted my viewing session to be more about me and wanted to be the very first person to see how I looked, just in case of some awkward poses which is always predictable with these kind of shoots (I am still in a fresh relationship so no embarrassing pictures of me shown to my bf yet, please). 

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When I entered the FFFB competition in the first place, I wrote the judges a story about me growing out of my phase of anorexia and how it had affected my self-esteem. It is not easy for someone who has been obsessing about her weight for years to just not think about it anymore – every additional kilogram still makes my heart sink a bit and gives a fair amount of guilt (this is why I have ignored scales for the past two years. As so many people have said, the thoughts never go away permanently. I still struggle to see myself as I really am but the pictures Kayleigh took are helping, big time.

When I saw the retouched pictures (apparently I wasn’t made to look thinner which gave me a great deal of relief somehow) I felt amazing. I sat in the viewing room, tearing up and my mouth half open. I couldn’t believe why I still sometimes feel guilty about some extra pounds. I didn’t intend to buy this many of the pictures but as I see it now, it’s an investment in a better mental health. Andrew Wood Photography also offers the chance to pay for the pictures in a small parts which is exactly what I’m doing. Cause boohoo, I’m a poor student. 

If you, my dear reader, ever have a chance to do a boudoir photoshoot I would recommend it from the bottom of my heart. It can make such a difference to one’s well-being and confidence which a goes a long way when it comes to overall happiness. Hope you enjoyed my story! xx 

PS. If you want to tell me what you think of the pictures, feel free! Comments are always welcomed 🙂 Also, if you have done a boudoir photoshoot yourself, I would love to hear about you experience as well!

Photography: Andrew Wood Photography
Lingerie: Curvy Kate (Tease Me and Carmen, both in 30GG)
Dress: Dorothy Perkins (size 8)

Basket case – with a heart beneath it all

29 Oct

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Hi! Apparently I’m the most efficient during night time so I wanted to put up a post for you – discussing looks, mostly my hair, style and boobs this time. This topic came to mind recently since I’ve been hitting bars lately. Like A LOT. Being single and having boobs and a certain sense of fashion is not always easy and I wanted to rant but also make you think about it from my perspective. Now I must say that YOU GUYS OUT THERE, listen up cause I’m sick of you judging me for various reasons.

This started out as mild amusement towards men who have a tendency to look at me from head to toe each time I walked through a bar door. Staring with eyes like massive plates I used to just laugh it all off, think how funny your gazes were and go on with my life. Girls looking at me were even funnier. Eat your heart out, I used to think. Then I started to miss male company, I started to miss being in a relationship.

I must confess, I’m not much of a single girl at heart. I don’t know how to hit on guys, I am actually quite shy when it comes to men I really like and am interested in. On the contrary that is not how I look; I actually seem like an arrogant bitch to some people, or so it seems. Last time I went to a bar with studded red suede heels with a massive pink bun on my head. I was a show stopper, big time. I live in a city where anyone looking like that gets basically stoned for being such a cocky-ass bitch. However, I love everything bold and colourful. Everything that looks like me. This is where we get to the root of my problem.

I love to look how I look but to other people I seem to be a red flag, waiting to be teared up by a herd of bulls. It scares people off, it makes me seem arrogant, it makes me less approachable. Add a pair of G cups and it makes me a damn slut. To some. I hate noticing after a wild dancing session everyone staring at me and whispering. You say I asked for it, I say I just wanted to dance. I go talking to a strange man, I’m almost begging for dirty looks from fellow women. And again, I was just trying to get to know someone.

Getting to know a new guy is a whole other story. I love men, but then again I hate you so dearly for being dicks about my appearance. “Omg, how can wear that?” is probably one of the worst things to say to a girl and believe me, I hear it a lot. I mean, does it make me a bad person if I wear something you wouldn’t? Does my outfit define me as a person? Hell no. Cause today I dress like this, tomorrow like something completely different. I am a gangsta, then a pin-up, another day a sports chick. What does that say about me? That I’m versatile, I feel differently about myself and the world each day and dress for that mood. The only thing that my outfit of the night tells you, is how I felt when I left my house. Try to read me like a book, it will be a failure. Promise. 

I recently saw this super funny video made by hilarious Jenna Marbles about what a girl’s hair means. It was right to the point; now you can judge girls even faster cause hey, their hairstyle says everything you need to know (NOT). Like I will suck your dick cause I have pink hair! Seriously, it’s funny now but think about it for one more minute and you’ll start to see how scary it is how people make crazy assumptions on your character just by looking at your hair, makeup or eg boobs. I mean WHY?  You guys who stare at me like some cheap piece of pork meat, did you know that I too have feelings, I can be a wonderful girlfriend and the most giving loving person on the earth? No, you didn’t. And meanwhile I could have been someone’s dream future wife, you would never know cause I had that damn pink hair. Which obviously told you I’m not girlfriend material.

I am so sick of this small town that wants to drown me in all its grayness and suffocate me with it’s prejudiced little people who apparently know all about me. I want to get to know people, I want to enjoy and hell I want to enjoy my clothes and cleavage when I feel like it without constant judgement passed upon me. I will never please everyone but at least hate me for who I am, not for what I look like.

PS. In the pic above are me and my little sister Ems. Stylish est 1992 and rocking the look.

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